Birds of Evergreen Out of Their Birdbrain Minds

I've heard of humans feeling like they're trapped in the wrong body: a man, who feels like he's really a woman or vice versa. But a bird, who feels deep down inside that he was born the wrong species of bird? Apparently, there's some of that going on in the woods of Evergreen.

First, there was the delusional robin, pecking at our window as if he were a woodpecker. And I don't mean just a few pecks here and there. I mean pecking at it - non-stop, every day for a few days. Some have suggested that he may have been looking at his reflection, thinking it was another robin, and trying to fight it.

I disagree. I think this robin had dissociative identity disorder. He would fly away, come back again and again, to peck in the same spots around our house - and peck so madly and derangedly there had to be something wrong with his birdbrain. He also did this to our neighbors truck window, all the while pooping away - on our window sill and their car door. Lovely, I know.

Today, I heard a weird chirp and thought it was a hummingbird once again trapped in our house. Looking down at the hummingbird feeder, I saw a most unusual sight: a woodpecker, hanging with half its body off the feeder, almost upside down like some sort of acrobat, trying to sip from the hummingbird feeder. Woody, you're a WOODPECKER, not a HUMMINGBIRD. And ROBIN - you are a redbreasted, worm-eating ornithoid, who heralds springtime's arrival, but most certainly does not typically peck at objects, such as glass or trees - ummm, that's a WOODPECKER.

What's wrong with these creatures? I've heard of "flights" of fancy, but these take the cake.

These birds are seriously confused.

A Tale of Two Sides of the Island

Aloha and Mahalo, Kauai. Today is our last night on the island.

The best thing is that both Fran and I feel like we really have squeezed every experience possible out of this island: hiking to a remote waterfall on the Na Pali Coast, surfing lessons (in shark-infested waters - seriously), taking a helicopter ride, snorkeling and witnessing the elegant sea turtle, who looks like he's flying in water, meeting a rare - and endangered - monk seal, as he lounged on the beach, swimming right up to our spot in the sand (he picked that particular space on an enormous beach), boogie boarding, taking in beautiful sunsets with mai tai in hand, swimming, lounging, reading, eating shave ice (local delicacy) and poke (another local delicacy, akin to sashimi sushi with spices). You name it, we did it.

It's been a great trip!

My title is a reference to Dickens' story, of course - the only novel I've read any time recently - that I finished here on the beaches of Kauai. It was the perfect beach read, but a little too suspenseful, since it kept me constantly wanting to get back to read to find out more about the fates of the Mannettes, Mr. Darnay, and Mr. Carton.

We left the north and east parts of the island - Princeville, Hanalei and Kapa'a - on Wednesday, and came to Poipu on the south shores. The difference in weather is amazing - it's almost always sunny here, whereas on the north side, it's almost always overcast and rainy (near the mountain that receives more rain than anywhere on earth). We're staying at the Sheraton, and we love it. Much, much better than the Princeville, in my opinion, other than the panoramic view we had there. But since most of your time in Hawaii should be spent not in your room, a good view is worth only so much.

Lots has happened since I last wrote. We've gone snorkeling at Tunnels Beach, which was a magnificent underworld previously unknown to me. There were the most amazing varieties and colors of all sorts of fish. And I even saw an eel, slithering through some of the "tunnels." Right as we were about to leave, bummed that we didn't see any sea turtles, Fran spotted one. It was so beautiful, using its wing-like front legs to swim, but the motion looked more like lazy flight, as the sea turtle drifted along. If anything hangs loose on this island (and a lot of things - including people - do) the sea turtle certainly embodies this laid back vibe, going with the flow of the ocean, wherever it seems to take him.

As Fran wrote in a postcard to his mom and dad:

We spent a day snorkeling and lounging at the beach in the photo (Tunnels) and luckily, just before coming in for the day, spotted a sea turtle and swam behind him across the reef. Talk about going with the flow - he looked to be the most relaxed creature I've ever seen - paddling lazily every few seconds, but otherwise, just riding the waves. We've tried to learn from him. We've minimized all effort on this vacation, happy as sea turtles to go with the flow.

The next day (I think) we hiked the Kalalau Trail along the Na Pali Coast - doing the four-mile round trip to Hanakapi'ai Falls. It was a muddy (very muddy) trip, but well worth it to swim in the refreshing pool below the enormous rush of water.

Life is Good. Ohm.

That's my new motto. At least for today.

It was a day of firsts - me with snorkeling, Fran with boogie boarding. And we both loved our newfound adventures, each of us showing the other how it's properly done.

Here's how today went:

Got up early and booked our helicopter flight over the island with Blue Hawaii. According to our guidebook, The Ultimate Kauai Guidebook, which I would highly recommend, not going on a heli ride in Kauai is like going to see the Sistine Chapel and not looking up. So heli we must. This guide, on a side note, has been right on - all the places the locals say are good, this book says are must-sees.

This morning for breakfast we went to Eggbert's, a local place. It was okay. Then we headed to gear up for snorkeling and boogie boarding at Boss Frog's. Met a guy who worked there and used to live in Boulder, Colo. Told him we should do a house swap some time, so he can ski and we can suntan. He was game, so we shall see!

We made a quick stop at Safeway and ABC to grab some ahi poke (essentially tuna sashimi with some excellent spices), shrimp poke, beer, water and apples. Only the necessities. Yum.

Then, we were off like a herd of turtles, heading to Kealia Beach to boogie board our brains out. And that we did. I used to boogie board every once in a while at the Outer Banks of North Carolina, when there was a sand bar and the waves were actually big enough to warrant something resembling surfing. Here, there were waves like this every two minutes. And they pummeled us, over and over. We caught a few really good ones and had a great time watching all the surfers do some incredible tricks. The first few minutes out in the surf were a little hairy, though, since there's a pretty strong undercurrent and riptides.

After spending a good portion of the day there (about three hours), Fran's sinuses were bugging him from all the saltwater, and we were both ready for a rest. So we headed to a "secret" beach near our hotel (secret, apparently, even from the guests to some degree), called Hideaways. To find it, you had to go down this very steep path, but the small beach at the bottom was incredible, with false kamani trees providing almost complete shelter from the sun. We realized by this time that I was really fried, and Fran was just sort of fried, after only applying 15 spf sunscreen once in our rooms before we left, and once before boogie boarding.

At this point, we also discovered that my snorkel mask was broken, but we tried snorkeling for a little while anyway. Wow. I've never done any of that before, but it was like being in a giant, endless aquarium full of tropical fish. The colors were so vibrant and the fish were huge. Unfortunately, most of the coral was dead, but Fran pointed out a few spots were it was still alive. I can't believe that there's an entire other world under the sea. It's so funny to watch the fish, too - they just kind of hang out, get moved by the currents and just seems sort of content. (On a side note, apparently the coral reefs around the world - like pretty much everything else - are endangered due to climate change and pollution; great recent article by Bryan Walsh in TIME: "Coral Reefs Face Extinction." Glad we got to see Hawaii's while they still exist - but Fran said he could tell that they weren't as vibrant as those he had seen on reefs in Samoa 10 years ago. It does seem, to some degree, that once bustling metropolises of the underworld are becoming ghost towns.)

After hanging at Hideaways, we headed back to our hotel room, which was within walking distance, and drank some wine while watching the sun set over Hanalei Bay. The sunsets here are really truly spectacular. Unlike any I've ever seen elsewhere, especially since there are always a few clouds, making for beautiful colors, like tonight's show, which was mostly orange and blue, then faded to orangy pink.

Fran said South Pacific, the movie, was filmed here. Every time I think of Bali Hai, I'll now think of Hanalei Bay - it looks exactly like you would picture the song - and the song in the movie was filmed right here.

I love the musical South Pacific, and so does my mother-in-law, Peggy, who bought me the sheet music, singing me her favorite song, "Some Enchanted Evening," long before either of us had any inkling that I'd fall in love with - and marry - her son!

In a Land Called Hanalei

Yesterday, Fran and I arrived in Kauai for our 10-DAY, yes 10-DAY vacation! We were both pretty tired, since I didn't sleep at all and Fran slept about 2 hours before getting up at 3:00 a.m. for our 6:00 a.m. flight. We were also a little jetlagged (Kauai is four hours different than MST), so it's actually 8:30 a.m. right now).

So we hung out on the beach, sipped some pina coladas, and jumped in the water. Later, we went and got some wine, cheese and crackers from the little local grocery store, and watched the sunset from our room - we got upgraded to ocean and mountain views! - as the sounds of the hotel's lu'au drifted up to our room.

We are staying at the Princeville Resort in Hanalei. It's gorgeous.

Today, we're off to go rent some snorkel gear and boogie boards and do those two things all day on the great beaches around here. Wahoo!